What makes us stronger...

I often wonder why certain things happen in certain peoples lives.  I am a true believer that everything happens for a reason.  My mom always told me from a very young age, God is always around you, protecting you.  I don't consider myself really religious, but I do believe in God and I truly believe that He knows what we can all handle and what we can't.  I guess the biggest thing I am learning from this whole experience of TTC is patience.  I hear that also from all my friends who struggled to conceive.  They feel that the patience that they gained from this experience helped them to really be better moms when that little one did finally come along.  I wonder if it might also help with my patience on the road, with other drivers...who clearly are there also trying to help me with patience! =) You know, it's funny all the thoughts that struggling to conceive leads you think about.  There is that self doubt that hits every once in a while. Will I be a good mother? Am I even meant to have children? Of course, I feel deep down that I am, but I can't deny these thoughts.  No matter what, I feel that this experience, the frustration over the last two years, has ultimately made me and my hubby stronger.  If we make it through this, we can make it through anything right?! I say that right now because we are in the middle of ripping up our upstairs bathroom floor and I definitely feel that my patience is being tested, but proving to be better. LOL!

I guess my mantra these days really is just that again everything happens for a reason.  I will be a better mother (and maybe even a better wife...that would make hubby happy) when the opportunity is finally presented to me. Life, experiences of good and bad, trials and tribulations, that is what makes us stronger. As much as I don't want to say it, I might be just a little bit grateful for the strength I have gained over the past two years, and especially these last couple of months.  Heck, maybe it is just preparing me for pregnancy...or gasp, maybe this means God really has always had twins in mind for me! Boy, talk about needed preparation for that! =)